Another Day Slowly Passes . . .

SONG OF THE MOMENT: "What Am I Here For?" - written by Duke Ellington

After having people read the last post, I've had people tell me that I need to pull myself together and and stay positive and I'm doing the best I can. They also have told me not to make contact, I need a complete cut-off. That sounds so easy but I really want to reach out. Maybe for everyone else they can do that, but I can't. It may even help me out. The one thing I fear is that if i was ever out in public and saw him, it may be the first time in a long time that I'd cry in public and that the last thing I want anybody to see. For some reason, this has been the worst case I have ever suffered. It wasn't as bad as yesterday but I still find myself crying. Its hard when you are all alone in an empty apartment.

Tonight is one of the few nights that mean alot to me. For those of you not in the know, I sing around the city. I haven't been getting professional gigs lately which is fine because I've been so busy , but Tuesdays are the sole outlet for my one true passion. Open Mic starts at 9:30ish at Thirty-One Sixty. Because its the holiday season, I also have such a short amount of time to sing Holiday music. Tonight might be the last time for the holiday music since I may not be able to sing next Tuesday. So if you come around and convince me to stay positive maybe I can crank out a few of my favorite holiday tunes instead of singing the jazz, blues, and soul that I usually do (and stuff which would definitely help me express myself instead of bottling it in.)